Have you seen some of the 10 Running Questions posts going around? I had planned to answer those this morning (thanks, Robin, for the tag!), but all weekend I was thinking about my friend Terzah’s answer to question number two: three words that describe my running. She listed:
I experience one or all of these every time I run. Even on my worst runs, getting out the door is always freeing.
Nearly every run is also rejuvenating. No matter how I feel at the start, my energy is revived, and I come home “sweaty and happy” as daddy and L like to say.
And it never fails that when I most need it, my run becomes therapeutic.
Such was the case with my 12 miler this weekend. I was excited to finally be back to longer weekend runs, and the weather was cool enough for an old favorite trail that had been too sunny for the summer months. I generally prefer to run in silence, as there is enough “noise” in my day and I value quiet time to think, pray, meditate, zone out… whatever is needed.
This weekend, I opted for music. I chose a new RPM track I’m memorizing for spin, and set out.
The cool weather, upbeat music and change of scenery combined for a nearly perfect run. I cruised along, feeling strong and lucky to be out, soaking it all up. I was having a blast, feeling upbeat and energized.
And then something happened.
The last song came on, “93 Million Miles” by Jason Mraz. The soothing, mellow song and appropriate lyrics struck me as I was approaching our house…
“To share this view of the night, a glorious night, over the horizon is another bright sky
Oh, my my how beautiful, oh my…father,
He told me, “Son sometimes it may seem dark, but the absence of the light is a necessary part.
Just know, you’re never alone, you can always come back home” [emphasis mine]
…and suddenly, as I began cooling down and stretching, I was overwhelmed with emotions and let the tears flow. “Home” can be interpreted various ways. For me, it holds a faith component. For others, it may be finding security in family, friends, within yourself.
The absense of light is a necessary part… I’m learning this over and over in life, there are stages where we cannot see what is to come, cannot possibly know why things are as they are, and this is okay. It is a necessary part. We are not in control.
My life is full. I feel blessed. I am content with what I’ve been given and what I have. But there are times when I struggle with the future… with letting go of my plans… with the questions when things go wrong- in my life, my larger community or devastating news around the world.
And this ability to find my emotions, release them, and feel refreshed again is what keeps me coming back to running. It was my mini-therapy session on Saturday. And I’m ready to face the uncertainties of the future again.
93 million miles from the Sun, people get ready get ready,
’cause here it comes it’s a light, a beautiful light, over the horizon into our eyes…